What happens when Jesus is born into a family?
When speaking of Joseph and Mary, what happened to them as a result of Jesus' physical birth? We'll talk more about that later. But speaking of your own family, how did your spiritual birth in Jesus Christ affect your family? How does knowing Jesus transform us and our families, with our generations of dysfunctionality?I don't know about you, but I come from a long line of heathens, pagans, sinners, and nasty "religious" people.
The Christmas story is really summed up in one Bible verse, John 3:16 (NIV) which says, "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoeverbelieves in him shall not perish but have eternal life."
But let me ask you something. What happened in your family when the first one of you allowed Jesus to be born into your life? You became a Christian. You received the Holy Spirit. You came under the authority of the King of kings. You began being mentored by the Lord of lords. You began drinking from living water. You began showing the fruit of the Spirit. You began producing good fruit because you were abiding in the vine of Jesus Christ.
Was your family overjoyed? Were they supportive? Did the dysfunctional family like it when someone started on the path of becoming functional? Let's take a look at what Jesus' birthdid to Joseph and Mary.
Joseph and Mary were engaged.
Matthew 1:18 (NIV) tells us, "This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about:His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph....
Ahh, the thrill of being in love! What was the response of Joseph's family to the good news of the engagement? A healthy family might have said something like, "How wonderful! We're excited for you!"
However, a dysfunctional family may have said something like, "What could she possibly see in you? I'll give it a year!" But think of the response of the family when it was found that Mary was with child, pregnant.
Matthew 1:18 (NIV) continues, "...but before they came together, she was found to be with child."
Can you imagine Joseph's heartache? He must have been crushed! And to make it worse, Mary was claiming that the child was conceived through the Holy Spirit. Is she crazy? Delusional? Lying?
Even in a healthy family you might hear, "Son, I'm not going to tell you how to deal with your woman, but come on." In a dysfunctional family, the blame and shame get heaped on. "What have you been doing? Have you no morals? She is trying to trap you." And when Josephtold them that the babywas conceived through the Holy Spirit, "Yeah, that makes sense, because you were conceived by the tooth fairy. You big dummy!"
Joseph considers his situation.
Matthew 1:19 (NIV) continues, "Because Joseph her husband was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly."
The healthy family's response to Joseph's idea is, "We will stand with you." The dysfunctional family might say, "She'll take you to the cleaners. You are such a disappointment."
But then comes this awesome, but overwhelming responsibility. Matthew 1:20-23 (NIV) continues, "But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, 'Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.'All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: 'The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel'— which means, 'God with us.' "
If you were Joseph, could you imagine sharing that dream at the breakfast table? Even the healthy family might say, well, I don't know what they might say. They might be speechless! But the dysfunctional family would have plenty to say! "What did you eat before you went to bed? Fermented dates? Well, the angel I talked to said that you were going to wash the breakfast dishes!"
The birth of Jesus.
Matthew 1:24-25 (NIV) tells us, "When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife. But he had no union with her until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus."
Luke 2:1-7 (NIV) says, "In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. (This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was governor of Syria.) And everyone went to his own town to register. So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn."
So if an angel came to you in a dream and said, "This is what God wants you to do," and you obeyed, wouldn't you assume that once you agreed and started the project that everything would go just right, perfectly?
Not so for Joseph! First there was a census. He had to walk 80 miles or so with a pregnant wife and no Dairy Queen or Taco Bell to satify her cravings. Then there was no room for them at the inn and they had to have the baby delivered while they stayed in the manger. Would you doubt the message of that dream? Would you believe the angel's message?
But then.....Jesus is born!Angels sing. Shepherds come to worship. Finally! Confirmation and a moment of peace.
The Christmas story continues.
Matthew 2:7-16 (NIV) continues, "Then Herod called the Magi secretly and found out from them the exact time the star had appeared. He sent them to Bethlehem and said, 'Go and make a careful search for the child. As soon as you find him, report to me, so that I too may go and worship him.' "
"After they had heard the king, they went on their way, and the star they had seen in the east went ahead of them until it stopped over the place where the child was. When they saw the star, they were overjoyed. On coming to the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. Then they opened their treasures and presented him with gifts of gold and of incense and of myrrh. And having been warned in a dream not to go back to Herod, they returned to their country by another route."
"When they had gone, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream. 'Get up,' he said, 'take the child and his mother and escape to Egypt. Stay there until I tell you, for Herod is going to search for the child to kill him.'So he got up, took the child and his mother during the night and left for Egypt, where he stayed until the death of Herod. And so was fulfilled what the Lord had said through the prophet: 'Out of Egypt I called my son.' "
"When Herod realized that he had been outwitted by the Magi, he was furious, and he gave orders to kill all the boys in Bethlehem and its vicinity who were two years old and under, in accordance with the time he had learned from the Magi."
Poor Joseph. His whole life is uprooted. He has no job, no family, and no friends in Egypt, yet he is told to go there. The healthy family might say to him, "You were warned in a dream to go to Egypt? How can we help you?" The dysfunctional family might say less helpful things like, "First you say he's not your baby, but now you're running off to Egypt! You are just trying to keep this baby away from us. You are ashamed of us. You never did love us!"
And now we've got crazy politicians out killing babies. This is just too much excitement in one year. And Joseph had such a peaceful life before Mary gave birth to Jesus. When Jesus came into your life, did he shake it up like Joseph's life got shaken up? Did Jesus put you through a whirlwind of change? Did the Father put a call on your life to bring Jesus to those around you?
Joseph takes his family back to Israel.
Matthew 2:19-23 (NIV) continues, "After Herod died, an angel of the Lord appeared in a dream to Joseph in Egypt and said, 'Get up, take the child and his mother and go to the land of Israel, for those who were trying to take the child's life are dead.'So he got up, took the child and his mother and went to the land of Israel. But when he heard that Archelaus was reigning in Judea in place of his father Herod, he was afraid to go there. Having been warned in a dream, he withdrew to the district of Galilee, and he went and lived in a town called Nazareth. So was fulfilled what was said through the prophets: 'He (Jesus) will be called a Nazarene.' "
How can we apply the Christmas story to our lives?
Like Joseph and Mary, we can be God's people. We can be the ones to carry Jesus into our families, despite the pressures placed on us by our dysfunctional families.
This Christmas, I challenge you to be the one who brings new habits from the kindom of God into your family. Here's some things you can strive to do during this Christmas season.
- Imitate Jesus.
- Put God first.
- Show empathy.
- Actively release love to others in word and deed.
- Use good communication skills.
- Frequently express appreciation and gratitude.
- Put family before friends.
- Patrticipate in family moments.
- Be committed to the family.
- Eat together.
- Include family members in decison making.
- Practice good conflict resolution skills.
- Accept and enjoy each other.
In other words, you need to live out the fruits that Jesus has brought into your life. Don't regress back into the sinful waysin whichyou lived before you knew Jesus as your Lord and Savior.
What fruits are we talking about? The fruits of the Spirit are listed in Galatians 5:22-23 (NIV). "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law." Let your family see the difference that Christ has made in your life. Let them see how differently you live and let them see the fruits of the Spirit lived outthrough your life.
Where do you find the strength to bring Jesus to your family?
You are probably thinking, "How on earth am I supposed to do this? How can I act Christ-like around my dysfunctional family? How do I find the strength to do this?"
Please repeat this powerful verse after me. Philippians 4:13 (NIV) says, "I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Who is "him"? Jesus Christ.
How can I change? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I imitate Jesus? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I put God first? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I show empathy? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I actively release love to others in word and deed? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I use good communication skills? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I frequently express appreciation and gratitude? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I put my family over my friends? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I participate in family moments when I don't feel like it? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I be committed to my family? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I sit down and eat with these people? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I include family members in decision making? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I practice good conflict resolution skills? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
How can I accept and enjoy my family, even when they don't know Christ? "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
Remember this Christmas season, when dealing with your dysfunctional family, that you can do everything through him who gives you strength. Through Jesus Christ, you can do everything. Joseph and Mary did. So can you.