The Rascal Flatts lyric, “LIFE IS A HIGHWAY” has been in my head all week. How many of you are like me? I can sing the opening line of a song, and maybe the chorus, but muddle through the rest! How many of you, once you hear a tune, can’t get it out of your head the rest of the day? The message “Life is a highway” gets drilled into our brain ad nauseum. Find your lane. Get in gear. Punch the gas. This is most people’s philosophy of life—stay with the flow, don’t get run over.
In Matthew 7:13-14 Jesus says, “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the highway that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the path that leads to life, and only a few find it.” Isn’t that amazing to read? Maybe the highway isn’t all it’s advertised to be. In Proverbs 14:12 it says, “There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death.” Just because a way seems right, or popular, or jammed full of people, or broad, wide, or well worn, or Emmy-nominated means nothing. Some roads lead to life, and some destruction.
Nowhere is this more true than in regard to our sexuality. In Jesus’ day, there were two camps of teachers. (1) There were those who looked to the Holy Scriptures for ancient paths… for the narrow way of sexuality that’s holy, righteous, and good, and restful and life-giving, and of God.
But there were also (2) those who resented God’s law… who regarded God’s way (especially in regard in sexuality) as too rigid and narrow and authoritarian… There were those who wanted to relax God’s requirements, and find loopholes, and broaden the path to accommodate people according to whatever whims they possessed.
We have the same two camps of people today. We have people who realize the way of Jesus (though good) is narrow. But then we have people that, if you don’t like what some preacher is saying, never mind if he’s being Biblically faithful to God’s Word, you go down the road until you find a teacher that tickles your ears with the words you want to hear… you shop for that preacher who will endorse what you already think and feel regarding matters of sexuality.
I think of Jeremiah 6:16 where the Lord God says, “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls…” But you said, 'We will not walk in it.'”
There are two types of people: (1) Those genuinely seeking rest within God’s will, “What is the way of God?” (2) And those saying, “It doesn’t matter! Don’t care! Not walking in it anyway! Life is a highway, I wanna ride it all night long… If you're going my way, I wanna drive it all night long.” Do you catch what that lyric is saying? I’m gonna ride it all night long… I wanna drive it all night long. There’s no rest outside God’s will—and this is especially true in regard to his teaching about sexuality.
In Matthew 5:27-28 Jesus says, “You have heard that is was said, ‘Do not commit adultery,’ but I say to you…” I think this is where the conversation needs to start about sexuality. Are we even open to the way of God? Are we poor in spirit? Are we broken, humble, and teachable? Are we hungering and thirsting for righteousness? Does whatever Jesus says trump whatever I think and feel, or seems right to me?
In Matthew 5:27-32, Jesus outlines a kind of road to destruction. For our purposes it might be best to think of the road to destruction AS A KIND OF JOURNEY.
The Covetous Heart (How we seek more and more...)
(1) The first leg of the journey begins with a covetous heart. The underlying problem in regard to adultery (all sexual sin) is covetousness. The tenth commandment says, “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.” A covetous heart is a heart that is always seeking more.
Think of it this way. Why go on a journey in the first place? Why get on the highway in the first place? It’s because you’re not content with where you are, or who you are, or who you are in Christ. And so what do you do? Like the prodigal son, you set your affection on the far country. This is where both spiritual and physical adultery begins. Your heart begins to imagine, “if only I had a better house, better companion, better life, better things… if only I could thow off the restraints of God’s commandments… surely a better life awaits, out there on the horizon.”
Every so often a LUTHER INGRAM SONG comes on the radio. Luther, knowing “his wife and two little children” are depending on him, has set his heart against what is good. He sings, “If loving you is wrong, I don't wanna be right. If being right means being without you, I'd rather live a wrong doing life.”
[Neither marriage nor adultery cures covetous heart]
When you came in today, you were given a blank sheet of paper. On that sheet of paper I want you to write the phrase, “Covetous Heart.” And I want you to wrestle with whether you truly want God to cleanse your heart. Jesus says, “You have heard that it was said, Do not commit adultery. But I tell you…” This is a different “but” than the one in Jeremiah 6:16. Its not the kind that says, “I’d rather live a wrong doing life.” It’s the kind that says, “Yes Lord??
Undisciplined or Unhealthy Eyes (How we keep seeking opportunity...)
(2) The second leg of the journey continues with undisciplined eyes. In Matthew 5:28-29 Jesus says, “You have heard that it was said, Do not commit adultery. But I tell you everyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of the parts of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.”
You might remember back in Genesis, what happened when Adam and Eve set their heart against God. The Bible says their eyes became “open” to new possibilities. Not just the possibility of doing good, but also of doing evil. “Eve saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it.” The heart always seeks opportunity through the eyes. The heart always directs the eyes what to give attention to. You can know a person’s heart just by merely tracking their eyes. Later in Matthew 6:23 Jesus says, “But if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!”
If life is a highway, and the heart is set for a distant country, the eyes are searching for any kind of onramp, any kind of opportunity for satisfaction. You’re up scanning the internet, clicking the clickbait? Your heads on a swivel, scanning the room, suddenly finding yourself captivated by someone whose entered the room. You’re feeling lonely and unappreciated, so you look about your social circles, and compulsively scan your social media.
What did Job say? Job 31:1, “I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman.”
On that sheet of paper write the phrase, “Undisciplined eyes” or maybe write, “Unhealthy eyes.” If a covetous heart doesn’t alarm you, undisciplined eyes should terrify you. Jesus invites us to take dramatic action, “If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of the parts of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.” This isn't a call to self-mutilation, but it is a serious call to a devout and holy life. I think of Colossians 3 which is filled with great guidance. Set your heart and mind on things above. When our eyes begin wandering toward unholy things, it’s time to literally turn unholy things off and create a more redemptive focal point for your eyes.
Sensual Hands and Wayward Feet (How we keep seeking intimacy...)
(3) The third leg of this journey to destruction continues with sensual hands. In Matthew 5:30 Jesus says, “And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of the parts of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.”
Notice the progression… the heart is seeking more, then the eyes are seeking opportunity (and given enough time, what do we know? Opportunity almost always presents itself. If your heart and eyes are bad, it's just a matter of time. And so, when opportunity presents itself, the hands act. To use our “LIFE IS HIGHWAY” metaphor… We’ve our heart set on a distant country. We see an opportunity. So we turn the wheel. We signal a lane change. We press the accelerator with our foot.
By the way, the foot can be just as bad as the hand. Later in Matthew 18:8 Jesus says, “If your hand or your foot causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life maimed or crippled than to have two hands or two feet and be thrown into eternal fire.”
With our hands and feet we seek out intimacy. What about the feet? Instead of walking in path’s of righteousness, we walk to places of opportunity, we put ourselves in the paths of people whose hearts want what our hearts want.
What about the hands? Just like the eyes betray the heart, the hands betray the eyes. Eve “saw” what was pleasing to the eye, and “reached” out, “took” the fruit, and “ate.” True intimacy is never found through sensuality, its found through purity. Remember what Jesus said? "Blessed are the pure in heart for they will see God!" This is true of all relationships! Purity allows us to really see another person, and have true intimacy, versus objectifying a person.
Here is the reality. Once foot/hand acts on covetous desire… Once a person has tasted or touched the object of their affection… once that engine of sensuality and desire gets revved up… there’s almost no stopping the heart. In my experience, until sensuality runs its course, there’s very little persuading a person to turn from their path. The relationship, the affair, the infatuation, the pornography addiction must run it’s course.
No amount of pain seems painful enough… no amount of distress seems distressful enough, to awaken a person to repentance. How powerful is sensuality? People will wreck their health, contract deadly diseases, ruin their reputation, ruin their marriages, leave their children fatherless/motherless, ruin their careers, wreck their finances, destroy friendship, walk away from Christ, … even risk hell itself… to satisfy that covetous desires of the heart. And its saddest thing to watch.
On your paper write “sensual hands,” “wayward feet.” Is it truly your desire to walk in paths of righteousness? For God to cleanse your heart, eyes, hands and feet?
Reckless Thinking (How we keep seeking justification...)
(4) The fourth leg of the journey to destruction is Reckless Thinking. In Matthew 5:31-32 Jesus says, “It was said, Whoever divorces his wife must give her a written notice/certificate of divorce. But I tell you, everyone who divorces his wife, except in a case of sexual immorality, causes her to commit adultery. And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”
What I want you to notice is that once a person sets their heart on something, and begins acting on it, their very next impulse is to seek justification for their sin. This is what a “certificate of divorce” is all about. It’s a document written by men, for men, explaining someone’s justification for divorce.
What did Jesus think about marriage? Marriage is one man and one woman becoming one flesh for a lifetime. A Pharisee asked Jesus, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason” Jesus says, “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
“Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?” 8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”
They imagined that just because Moses permitted something, God automatically ordained it! If you do a study of Jesus’ teaching on divorce you are going to find teachers who take more restrictive, and those who take more permissive views. Same with churches. Churches span the range of restrictive all the way to permissive. Permissive of not just any grounds for divorce, but permissive of LBGTQ marriages, and every other kind of human whim.
Whatever justification you seek in the eyes of men matters little. It comes down to Jesus. “You’ve heard… but I say unto you…”
What did Jesus think about reconciliation? Jesus didn’t just have a high view of marriage, he had an even higher view of reconciliation. For Jesus reconciliation meant “being perfect as our heavenly Father is perfect.” In the Old Testament God spared no measure to woo adulterous Israel back into covenant relationship. God was willing to be faithful even though Israel wasn’t faithful. More than this, God wasn’t even willing to spare his One and Only Son to reconcile Israel to Himself.
When Paul talks about Christian marriage later in Ephesians 5, he describes Christian marriage as a reflection of God’s love for Israel, and Christ’s love for the Church. How does God think of us as his bride? He loves his bride so much, he refuses to let anything separate us from his love! In fact, though Jesus makes an exception for sexual immorality, God doesn’t even let adultery come between He/Israel. Ever read the book of Hosea? How God told Hosea to take back Gomer as his wife over and again despite her adulterous betrayals?
But back to this path toward destruction. What happens? Instead of asking how God can be glorified in relationships (through commitment to covenantal love, through reconciliation)… we begin to project our justifications back upon God. We begin to imagine that God thinks like we think, and feels like we feel, and wants what we wants, and is partial to our case. In Matthew 5, and also over in Matthew 19 Jesus sets the record straight. God doesn’t think about marriage/relationships at all like us.
On your sheet of paper write “Reckless Thinking.” Because maybe the way that has “seems right to a man” actually leads to death. Maybe you’re thinking it’s time to make a u-turn, to get off this highway, and find the nearest exit.
The Slow (or Quick) Death of the Soul (Why we begin seeking hope...)
(5) The final leg of this journey to destruction is the slow death of the soul. Those who justify the failure of one relationship, go on to justify the failure of the second, and third, and fourth. If we don’t take a detour from this pattern of destruction, the pattern keeps repeating, and the trail of destruction multiplies. James 1:13-15, “When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; 14 but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. 15 Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.
On your paper write, “slow death.” We should seize every opportunity to turn to God our heart… eyes… hands/feet… in our thinking before sexual sin destroys us.
So what does it look like for a heart, ravaged by the pain of adultery, to seek hope?
#1) God invites us to Total Heart Surrender.
Jeremiah 6:16 the Lord God says, “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls…” In Matthew 11:28-30, Jesus says, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”
The rest your searching for isn’t found on the highway, its found in returning to God. Jesus promises “if we seek “first” his kingdom righteousness, all these things will be added unto us.” That sounds an awful like total satisfaction. Total satisfaction through total surrender!
#2) God invites us to Ruthlessly Honest Confession.
Confession is agreeing with God. 1 John 1:8-9, says, “If we say, “We have no sin,” we are deceiving ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
A great example of confession is Psalm 51, where David prays, “Lord, create in me a clean heart, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.” If it’s your prayer this morning for God to create in you a clean heart… come forward during this song and let your half sheet of paper be your prayer. Lay it in the water, and ask God to forgive you, and cleanse you of all unrighteousness…” Ask God to lead you in paths of life, and righteousness, and rest…
Communion Thought...
[Passage: John 3:3-10] It was Jesus custom to gather with his Apostles in the upper room (and other places) in order to break bread and share a cup of wine. This same became the tradition of the Early Church, and it is our tradition at Lakeside. Jesus instituted this meal to commemorate his death and sacrifice but to also celebrate our resurrection hope of celebrating this feast in God's eternal Kingdom. But on one occasion, after supper, Jesus removed his outer garment, took a basic of water and a towel and began worshipping the disciple's feet. When Jesus got to Peter, Peter refused to let Jesus wash his feet. But Jesus insisted, reminding Peter that the meaning of what he was doing would matter greatly later on, and secondly, that if Peter didn't let Jesus cleanse his feet Peter "could have no part in Him."
The thought of having no part in Jesus alarmed Peter. Peter went from refusing baptism to insisting upon being baptized all over (feet, hands, head, etc). But Jesus said Peter didn't need to be completely washed all over again, he just needed his feet cleansed. If you've never given your life to Jesus, you need to be baptized and washed from head to toe and be cleansed and forgiven. But if you have already been baptized, you need to allow Jesus to cleanse what must be cleansed (your heart, your eyes, your hands/feet, your mind, etc.) Its not necessary to keep getting rebaptized when you struggle with sin. Nor is it necessary for you to mutilate your body (cut off hand/foot, gouge out your eye, etc.) On the cross Jesus was already mutiliated and crucified on our behalf. We simply need to be washed by his blood, and washing is so much better than mutilation agree?
Communion is a time of confession, lets ask God to cleanse what needs to be cleansed...