Living an authentic life
Merry Christmas! If any of you are like me, yesterday was only the beginning of many celebrations and parties with family and friends. So thank you for being here this morning to worship with us. For those who may not know me, my name is Brad Owen, and I am the student pastor here at Lakeside. This morning we are going to explore how our relationship with God impacts our relationship with the church, with our co-workers, and with our families.
Last weekend, my wife Christen and I and some close friends had the opportunity to spend the weekend in St. Louis and hear the St. Louis Symphony Orchestra perform a Christmas concert. If you have never heard a symphony such as that, you are missing out on some amazing music, especially if it is Christmas music. As I listened, it got me thinking about playing in the band from fourth grade through my senior year. A flood of memories came back about all the concerts and competitions that I performed in over the years. I was so inspired by what I heard, this morning I wanted to play a piece for you that I heard over the weekend. (Note to reader: Brad played the trumpet very badly!)
What did you think? Sweet music to your ears, huh? All of those years in band, and I never practiced or played the trumpet. I was actually a trombone player.
Some Christians do not lead authentic lives.
Unfortunately, I think a lot of us are exactly like this regarding our relationship with God. We walk around looking like we are authentic, and acting like we are authentic, but it becomes glaringly obvious to the people around us that we are not authentic as evidenced by the way we live, the things we say, and the way we treat others. The music of our lives does not sound like a sweet symphony.
We just finished our series on the gospel of Mark. We experienced the life of Christ and all of his works and teachings. He left the disciples with the responsibility to live authentic lives and to become his church. He called them to be his disciples and to make disciples of their own.
In Romans 12 Paul gives the Church similar instructions for how they should live. Romans 12:1-2 (NIV) says, "Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God-- this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-- his good, pleasing and perfect will."
Please pray with me. God, we ask that today that you would open our hearts to your words and the message that you have for us. Right now we invite you to do your will in our lives. God, show us the things that we need to see so that we can live authentic lives that are pleasing to you. Transform us so we can be authentic.
We must be authentic in all of our relationships.
We are talking about relationships this morning. We can't fake out the people in our lives when it comes to our relationship with God, at least not if we spend any significant period of time with them.
Our relationship with our church body can be affected by lack of authenticity.
Being fake in our relationship with God negatively affects our earthly relationships. God speaks to our relationship with our church family. 1 Corinthians 12:26-27 (NIV) says, "If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it."
How can the church body function properly if its parts send a message that everything is okay, when it isn't okay? What happens to a church body when this happens? Let's all imagine for a minute that we are a big toe. Now picture that you have an ingrown toenail. If you ignore the toenail, it leads to further injury and infection. It is dysfunctional!
We were not called to be a part of the body so that we can pretend, or not be authentic. We have been given the body as a gift. We are not meant to go about life or about living our faith all on our own. We get caught in the trap of believing that we have to be perfect in order to be a part of the church body. We think we would be looked down upon for not being perfect. News flash! We aren't perfect! Get over it!
We all need to be real and authentic so that the body can function the way that God designed it to. God designed the body to encourage, protect, help, heal, and guard. We need to be focused on pursuing God so that we live authentic lives that are reflecting his glory.
Our relationship with our co-workers can be affected if we are not authentic.
How many of you have "that" co-worker? If you can't think of one, then it might be you. OK, I'm just kidding! You know the one I mean. The one who knows everything about everyone. How about the know-it-all? The worst yet, the super Christian. That guy or gal who lets everyone know that he/she is a Christian. But the way they interact with others, or the way that they treat people, is not at all what Christ calls us to represent.
Titus 2 gives us a blueprint for our conduct with our co-workers. I encourage you to read it on your own, as there is some incredibly rich stuff in this chapter. I am going to hit just a couple of highlights from this chapter that relate to our relationships with co-workers.
Titus 2:7 (NIV) says, "In everything set them an example by doing what is good."
Titus 2:9-10 (NIV) says, "Teach slaves to be subject to their masters in everything, to try to please them, not to talk back to them, and not to steal from them, but to show that they can be fully trusted, so that in every way they will make the teaching about God our Savior attractive."
In other words, the Bible teaches employees to work hard to please their employer, to not talk back to superiors or give them attitude, to not steal from work, and to show that they are trustworthy and hard working. All this is so that they communicate an authentic Christ-like life to their co-workers.
Remember, your first priority needs to be your relationship with Christ, so that you are living an authentic life in front of your church family and your co-workers. But what about your family?
A lack of authenticity affects your relationship with your family.
As a parent, what would you do for your child? I can tell you the answer to that. Anything!
Who hasn't felt the pressure at Christmas time to go overboard with gifts for your family? We want to make the Christmas morning experience perfect! I can still remember the Christmas morning that we opened up that brand new original Nintendo! Christmas is just one example where parents are willing to go to great lengths for their children.
What would you do if your newborn or toddler desperately needed something? You would do anything! Let me tell you a true story. At the age of 13 months, Dax was diagnosed with AML M7 leukemia. He was life-flighted to St. Jude's Children's Research Hospital where he underwent two bone marrow transplants. Both of his parents were able to give their bone marrow to him. Since his disease was so rare, Dax's prognosis was not certain. In the fall, the doctors informed the family that Dax might not make it to Christmas. His parents knew how much he loved the Christmas lights, and they decided to decorate for Christmas in October. They put up the tree and decorated the house with lights.
It wasn't long before the neighbors caught wind of what was going on. Soon, the entire neighborhood was decorated for Christmas. News of Dax's story quickly spread and the entire town of Washington, Illinois was decorated for Christmas so that Dax could have one last Christmas. Dax lost his battle with cancer on December 30, 2009 at the age of 2. Dax's parents did everything they could for Dax in that bleak situation.
I think we take it for granted that most parents would do almost anything for their children. But as a parent, are you willing to do the thing that your child needs from you the most? Are you willing to model for your child your authentic faith in Jesus Christ?
Teenagers need their parents to lead authentic lives.
Over the last 10 years or so, I have had the privilege to work with junior high and high school students. I have encountered teens with a multitude of issues. These are issues that affect their lives, such as identity crises, alcohol abuse, drug use, not feeling loved, cutting/self mutilation, sexual activity, physical or emotional abuse, being bullied, gossip, eating disorders, unauthentic faith, parents being divorced, and thoughts of suicide. These Christian teens are broken!
How is it that good Christian teens can be experiencing all of these issues? What happened? Well, some of the causes include Satan's lies, sin in our lives and in our world, personal and family priorities becoming out of whack, or unapologetic rebellion. There is no doubt that teens need their parents like no time ever before. It seems so much easier to meet their physical needs than to meet their spiritual needs, doesn't it?
So what does any of this have to do with living an authentic life? It means everything! Many youth I have encountered over the years were disillusioned in their faith. Many times their disillusionment was a result of their parents' lack of authenticity in their lives. Church was just something else, another activity, that they did. Christ was not the center of their lives. The teens learned that going to church and their relationship with God was simply another thing on the priority list that often got bumped down for other things. The things that the parents claimed to be important were not the same things that were modeled to be important. The teens saw a double standard in their parents' lives.
Oftentimes, teens don't feel like they have a need for God because it has never been demonstrated in the family life on a day to day basis. It is very easy to fall into the trap of feeling self sufficient. When we don't demonstrate in our lives that God is the authority in our lives, and all we have is his, children don't have a realistic understanding of their own need for God. Many families are too proud to ask the church family or others for prayer. They are trying to uphold the perfect family image.
When we come to church with all of our dysfunction and all of our issues, and then act as if life is simply grand, what message does that send to our children? It communicates that Christians are fake. It communicates that neither the body of Christ nor God has the power to change the messed up situations that we are coming from.
We might be able to fool others at church or those we work with, at least for a while, but we cannot fake out our children. They kill the fake factor. They can see through our deception and know who we really are. They need us to set the example in our lives by pursuing an authentic and life-transforming relationship with God.
Malachi speaks about the heart of a parent.
Malachi 4:5-6 (NIV) says, "See, I will send the prophet Elijah to you before that great and dreadful day of the LORD comes. He will turn the hearts of the parents to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers; or else I will come and strike the land with a curse." We as parents must allow God to turn our hearts to our children first, before our jobs, before our relationships, and before our own issues. And that means setting an example for them to follow.
Micah 6:8 (NIV) instructs us. "He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God." God simply requires that we walk humbly with him, pursuing him and his purposes.
God has instructions for children also.
God also has something to say to you, children. 1 Timothy 4:11-12 (NIV) says, "Command and teach these things. Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity."
Teens, children, and young adults, you don't have an excuse to not follow Christ with all of your heart. You can't blame your parents or anyone else. Paul is empowering you to live boldly and to set an example. Young people, be the change! Be authentic!
God has given us everything we need to know on how to live an authentic life.
The Bible, God's word, is rich and full of helpful guidance and instruction for how we ought to live our lives. Josh McDowell gives us five ways to reach children. He says that children must see real love in the people of the church. They must see their church as a group of people full of active compassion to the disadvantaged. Children must see the church's concern for the environment, for God's creation. They must see that our relationship with God transforms our relationships of marriage and family. And last, children must see fathers who live transformed lives and who relate to them purposefully.
Men, we need to step it up! We are the head of our families. We are the leaders of the church. But we often don't even take the time to spend meaningful time with our children.
Parents, are you willing to do the thing that your child needs from you the most? When our children are young, we protect and guard them. That is still our responsibility when they become teens. They need us to be bold and to speak truth into their lives. We need to know what is happening in their lives so that we can protect them.
Would you know if your child was struggling with identity issues, alcohol, or drugs? Would you know if your child was not feeling loved or was experimenting with cutting and self mutilation? Would you know if your child was sexually active, being bullied or abused, or was depressed? Would you know if your child was struggling with hurtful gossip, eating disorders, unauthentic faith, or suicidal thoughts? Do you know how your divorce is affecting your child? Some of your children are struggling with many of these issues.
What is a parent's responsibility to his children? It is your God-given responsibility to raise them to know God. It is your job to make them mad when they want to leave the house dressed inappropriately. It is your job to speak truth in love about their friends and their relationships. It is your job to know how they are struggling. It is our job to teach them what is good. The bottom line is that it's our responsibility to provide our children with a godly example to follow, as we ourselves follow Christ.
We must pray for each other.
We are going to have an opportunity for you to respond to God through prayer throughout the next song. I'd ask that you all be praying for my family that we don't fall into these traps and lies! I'd invite you to be praying for all the families within the body of Christ.
As the body of Christ, we are openly and authentically going to seek him and his desire for our relationships. There are going to be some men and woman spread out in the back of the room who are ready to pray with you. If you need prayer for your relationships, please take this time to seek one of them out.
Let's take this opportunity to invite God to help us live authentic lives. Seek the prayer and council you may need in your own life. You may want to spend this time praying with your family and for your challenges. Pray with those around you for their relationships. Go pray with someone if God has put them on your heart.
God's grace will allow us to live authentic lives.
In 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NIV) Paul says about God, "But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me."
I am not an expert on parenting. I am not an expert in all relationships. I know that we are going to make mistakes as we raise our children. I know that I am going to make mistakes in many of the relationships I have in this life. The truth is we all are imperfect and have issues to work through. But I also know that if we have the right priorities and put our relationship with God first, that his grace is sufficient for our lives. I know I have done everything I've been asked to do.
God is big enough and his grace is sufficient enough to work to help us lead authentic lives, despite our imperfections and mistakes. I have seen God be glorified in so many students through their weaknesses. God's power to redeem us, despite our sin, is the most amazing part of his grace. No sin, no brokenness, and no dysfunction is beyond God's ability to redeem us. Our lives will demonstrate his power and grace. We must simply be obedient, and live authentic lives committed to him. He will take care of the rest.