We would not exist were it not in part for our mothers.
Well, happy Mother's Day! This is one day every living creature can find a reason to celebrate. The Bible reminds us, lest we forget, that we wouldn't exist were it not in part for our mothers. That's not just a fact of nature. If we didn't have days like this, it might be pretty easy for us to take our mothers for granted.
But God says we should honor our fathers and our mothers. And this doesn't mean just with Hallmark cards. God even says we should put our religion into practice, care for our families, and to do so knowing that we are repaying our parents and grandparents by living a God-honoring life. While you have the opportunity, and you may not always, find creative ways to bless your mother. Surprise her, honor her, lighten her load, care for her, and appreciate her!
I don't know about you, but I always feel so inadequate on Mother's Day. I mean, what can you really do in the span of one day to truly say thanks to your mother? No card, no amount of chocolate, no words, and no single gift can adequately capture our gratitude. But that doesn't mean we shouldn't try!
Mother's Day can also be bittersweet. Some of you have had to say goodbye to your mothers. Three years ago I watched Lara's mother, Margaret, care for her 100-year-old mother Lois. Every day, she read to Lois, talked with her, prayed with her, took her to church, did her laundry, kept her bills, shopped for her, talked to doctors, talked to the nurses, or threw parties. On Mother's Day we always had a meal with Lois, and when she couldn't leave the facility, Margaret carried a huge meal into her. Lois enjoyed life to the fullest because Margaret loved her just like she was serving the Lord. It is an exhausting labor of love, but what a tremendous gift it is to love our mothers and reflect Christ's love! Such love is never in vain.
Mother's Day can also be bittersweet because it stirs an unfulfilled longing. Many ladies are blessed to have children. But others pray and agonize daily for the opportunity to raise a family. Still others grieve, as it appears that window of opportunity is closing, or has closed, or is open no longer for even more children. That's really hard.
Every woman has a chance to fulfill her deepest longings of being a mother.
One thing I love about church is that here, every woman has a chance to fulfill her deepest longings of being a mother. Yes, there are many ladies here raising children of their own. But there are even more who are adopting, providing foster care, serving in our ministry, teaching in our schools, volunteering in after school programs, coaching sports, and coming alongside other people's biological children as sisters and mothers in Christ.
I know the biological connection between a mother and a child is powerful. But the spiritual connection possible between a woman and a child-- even a child not born of her own flesh and blood-- is transcendent and eternal. Not every woman becomes a biological mother, but every woman can be a mother nonetheless.
I was blessed with an awesome mother who loved me, taught me God's word, prayed for me, inspired me, and disciplined me. But I can count dozens of women who've been like mothers to me in the Lord. In fact, isn't it true that sometimes the women who most stand out to us for their exceptional love, beyond our own mothers, have been women who didn't have children of their own? I don't think that is an accident.
In fact, let me enlarge the audience here and pull in the men too. I want to talk for a few minutes about the amazing responsibility we have, as the family of God, to be spiritual fathers and mothers to our younger people.
In Ephesians 6:1-4 (NIV) we read this instruction, "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother-- which is the first commandment with a promise-- that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth. Fathers, do not exasperate you children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord."
So let's highlight four amazing responsibilities we have to young people.
Set an inspired standard for children.
I know some are tempted to use Ephesians 6:1 like a hammer. "Obey your parents!" It's the same thing jerks do with Ephesians 5:22 (NIV). "Wives, submit to your husbands..." But I look at this verse differently. There is a qualifier tagged onto this command. "Obey your parents in the Lord." (emphasis added)
This tiny phrase puts the burden on the adult/parent side of the relationship. If you're not in the Lord it might be really hard, and at times harmful, for a child to obey you. Not every adult is worthy of imitation, but every adult in right relationship to the Lord surely is worthy of imitation and obedience!
Ephesians 5:1-2 (NIV) says, "Be imitators of God, therefore as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as fragrant offering and sacrifice to God."
Christ set an inspired example for his children to obey. The standard of Christ's life is so loving that his children willingly obey him. And such obedience is joyful, refreshing, and even exhilarating. Having children, or serving children, should never be your primary objective. Our primary objective is first and foremost to be in the Lord and to be imitators of God. Once we're right with the Lord, then we're ready to lead little ones.
We don't give kids enough credit. Children were drawn to Jesus because of his life, his love, and his character. The disciples saw this as a nuisance. But I've noticed this my whole life. Children gravitate to adults who live as Jesus lived. So let's agree to inspire children!
Prepare children for the real life.
I always think it's ironic that the one show called "Real World" on MTV does very little to prepare children for the real world. Instead, this show teaches our youth to live in extended adolescence. This show dishonors, scorns, and shows contempt for the lessons our parents have imparted on us.
Notice that in scripture, a primary goal for a child is that it might, "...go well with you and that you may enjoy a long life on the earth." This is a pretty sober verse. There are no guarantees in parenting. But this isn't an excuse not to give your very best. From the moment a child is born, she is becoming an adult. If you're not helping that child become an adult, you're not properly loving that child.
Yesterday, I was with my mom and dad, and my mom was admiring a nest of baby robins who took refuge in a wreath on her porch. The mom and dad birds were nearby, watching over them, feeding them, and watering them. In a matter of days they are going to nudged out of this comfortable nest and be taught to run for their lives, climb into bushes for protection, flap their wings, evade danger, and dig for worms.
Seeing how the robins behave toward their children, no one has ever concluded that the robins are mean to their babies. No, we say that the robins are loving. It's loving for a baby bird to be prepared for the real world. Only in human relationships is insisting that a child learn adult lessons considered mean. "If you don't work, you don't eat." This sounds mean, but it's how the world works. Can we agree not to coddle, but equip children for life in the real world?
Provide an emotionally healthy home.
Ephesians 6:3 warns fathers not to exasperate a child, or provoke his anger. This is talking about the emotional climate we provide for young people. If you are a parent, you need to be less like judge Simon Cowel and more like, take your pick, any of the four coaches on "The Voice"! The reason "American Idol" is tanking is because it's cynical, discouraging, superficial, harsh, and excessively judgmental. The reason "The Voice" is excelling is because it's all about coaching, walking with, encouraging, guiding, being patient, kind, understanding, constructive, optimistic, and hopeful. Can we agree that what children really need isn't a thumbs up or a thumbs down? What they really need is an encouraging hand up! Any of us who are in the Lord can be that kind of encourager coach.
Keep your children anchored.
Ephesians 6:4 (NIV) says, "...bring them (children) up in the training and instruction of the Lord." Proverbs 22:6 (NIV) says, "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." Can we agree that giving children encouragement, guidance, and direction is of utmost priority? Can we agree that letting them drift aimlessly is a formula for disaster? Can we agree that Lakeside needs to be a family that equips parents and rigorously trains children to choose God's very best for their lives?