I have always enjoyed a certain measure of sarcasm. It can be fun bantering back and forth with another person, trading sarcastic barbs and matching wits. And who hasn’t enjoyed a roast now and then, of a person at a party? Sarcasm is saying one thing but meaning another.
I came across some sarcastic quotes on the internet to get us started.
"He was happily married, but his wife wasn’t."Victor Borge
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." Mark Twain
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."Clarence Darrow
"Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence." Ashleigh Brilliant
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." William Faulkner, speaking about Ernest Hemingway.
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." Forrest Tucker
The problem with sarcasm is exactly what my mother used to say to me. "Jon, sometimes people may not know when you are joking." Or as some are fond of saying, "There is a lot of truth spoken in jest."Sarcasm can be a way of covering up how we really feel about a person. It can be a way of pointing out error without truly coming alongside another to encourage, love, or offer support.
Sarcasm is more than just words. It's an unwillingness to love your neighbor.
You might be interested to know that sarcasm is an ancient Greek word literally meaning, "to tear flesh apart, to cut apart, to bite one’s lips in rage." There is a lot more to sarcasm than words. Consider Paul’s warning to the Galatians in Galatians 5:13-15 (NIV). Paul discerns against a sarcastic spirit that’s ripping the church apart. "You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love. The entire law is summed up in a single command: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other."
In Matthew 5:21-26 (NIV), Jesus takes this same sarcastic spirit to task by saying, "You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, 'Do not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.' But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, 'Raca,' is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, 'You fool!' will be in danger of the fire of hell."
"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift. Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still with him on the way, or he may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. I tell you the truth, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny."
It is easier to be sarcastic than to show courage in confronting another person.
It is easier to be sarcastic. It is easier to drive by, take shots, or make little digs. It is easier to bite and devour, to take a person apart verbally, to craft cute nicknames, to assign labels, to speak of others with contempt or ridicule, to talk about and gossip about a person rather than go to that person.
The alternative is not so easy. It’s harder to show courage, be present, approach a person face to face, be truthful, show a personhis fault in love, offer a hand up, seek full understanding, pray with, be reconciled, or settle matters quickly. At the heart of sarcasm is an unwillingness to love your neighbor as yourself. Sarcasm keeps close company with cynicism, pessimism, suspicion, disparagement, skepticism, distrust, doubt, scorn, and disdain.
Sarcasm never produces positive change in us or in other people. Sarcasm is the coward's way out. If we truly cared in our heart of hearts, we would offer ourselves to the other. We would not talk about him, not gossip, not assign labels, not avoid, not condemn, and not build a case against him. We’d spend more time building intothe relationship andless time building the case against that person!
A way to saythis differently is thatgrowth is about encouraging, and not about condemning.
The example of Christ.
John 3:16-18 (NIV) tells us, "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God's one and only Son."
John 8:1-6 (NIV) says, "But Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group and said to Jesus, 'Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?'They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him."
Please note that the Pharisees were so hell-bent on building a case against Jesus that they were seeking to destroy another person.
John 8:6-11 (NIV) continues. "But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, 'If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.'Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground. At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. Jesus straightened up and asked her, 'Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?' 'No one, sir,' she said.'Then neither do I condemn you,' Jesus declared. 'Go now and leave your life of sin.' "
Capturing the spirit of our faith.
2 Thessalonians 2:16-17 (NIV)captures the spirit of our faith. "May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word."
In Matthew 7:1-5 (NIV)Jesus tells us,"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye."
James 4:12 (NIV) instructs, "There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you—who are you to judge your neighbor?"
Romans 2:1-4 (NIV) admonishes us."You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things. Now we know that God’s judgment against those who do such things is based on truth. So when you, a mere man, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God’s judgment? Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness leads you toward repentance?"
Hebrews 10:19-25 (NIV) , "Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching."
Practical suggestions.
- Take responsibility for others' successes. Change your attitude and intend to help them succeed.
- Speak the truth in love. Get into the game, and put love into action.
- Allow space for grace to work, and give it some time.Sanctification is lifelong process.
- Allow space for God to work.God is the judge andGod knows the heart of a person.