Where's your "Man Card?"
The Urban Dictionary defines man card as, "whatever is required to be accepted as a respectable member of the male community." Your man card can and should be revoked by other respectable males for doing man things that are not respectable. Here are a few examples.
Crying during a chick-flick. Becoming whiney with the guys. Posting status updates about "The Bachelor". Being a "Belieber" or going to a Justin Bieber concert under any pretext whatsoever! Drinking skim milk. Having your girlfriend kill the spider because you're too scared. Having your wife open the jar of peanut butter or jelly because you're too weak! You don't want to get your man card revoked!
Everyone has their own conception of what it is to be a man, including the apostle John. In 1 John 2:12-17 he calls out young men, fathers, and children, and talks about what really matters. "Hey, this is what matters when you're a small child, when you're young and strong, when you get out in the world, and when you become a father yourself."
This is not intended to be exclusive to men. Everything obviously applies to all believers. It's just that men are often the very first to step away from God's path.
The Ecclesiastes Man or the Typical Man
Before I sketch out the apostle John's conception of manhood, I want to start with his description of the typical, ordinary man. The typical man is described in 1 John 2:15-17 (ESV) where John says, "Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world-- the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life-- is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires..."
There are a couple of phrases that really jumped out at me in these verses. For example, the typical man loves the world and all that is in the world. More specifically, the typical man lives for the desires and cravings of the flesh, the desires and lusts of his eyes, and the pride of life. Essentially, he is living for things that are passing away.
A book of the Bible that reveals the mentality of the typical man is the book of Ecclesiastes. Solomon fully and unapologetically turned away from God and denied himself nothing in his pursuit of satisfaction. He worked hard, played hard, laughed hard, consumed books and knowledge, and he kept his heart from no pleasure. He got wasted on wine, indulged in the finest foods, built houses with extravagant pools, built magnificent cities, planted vineyards, grew forests, took on men and women slaves to do his work, amassed gold and silver, delivered cities in wartime, and delighted in his concubines. He sought honor and prestige, and wielded great power politically. Whatever his eyes desired, he did not deny himself. Whatever he craved, he indulged himself in that thing. He chased the pride of life!
In all that Solomon did, there was one thing that continually haunted him. The lust of the eyes, the craving of the flesh, the pride of life-- all the pursuits of his youth-- he later described as all vanity. It was all meaningless. It lacked an enduring quality. The world, and all that was in it, was passing away. The things of the world couldn't sustain him, not in life, and especially not in death.
An older man often looks back upon his life, and grieves. What's been done has been done. All things are vanity, a striving after the wind. What's crooked cannot be made straight. What's lacking cannot be counted. There is no remembrance of former things. The eye is never satisfied in seeing, the ear is never satisfied in hearing, and the tongue is never satisfied in tasting. The body wearies under the heat of the sun, the oppressors continue to oppress, and the evil prevail. Generations come, generations pass.
The Victorious Man
How many Ecclesiastes men do we have to see crash and burn in the lust of their eyes, the cravings of their flesh, and the pride of life, before we see the utter futility of a life lived in hostility against God? In contrast to the typical man or the Ecclessiastes man is the victorious Man. The victorious man is a man who, as the apostle John says, overcomes evil, overcomes the world, overcomes the evil one, and abides with God forever! Three attributes distinguish the victorious man.
A Fully-Forgiven Man
In 1 John 2:12 (ESV) John says, "I am writing to you, little children, because your sins are forgiven for his name's sake." When you are eighty or ninety years old, as John was when he wrote this book, everyone is a child relative to your age. But what John is teaching here is quite profound. What if, in addition to reading, writing, and arithmetic, we understood the power of sin, its oppressive influence on everything around us, its hold on our life, our inability to will it away? What if we understood the necessity of our being forgiven of sin, but also being set free from sin by the power of God? There are many fully grown men who've never understood or applied this core doctrine.
The issue isn't God's power, nor God's willingness to forgive our sins. The issue is our willingness to see our sin, confess our sin, turn from sin, and be cleansed of sin through God's power. 1 John 1:9 (ESV) says, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteoursness." Such confession and cleansing should become habitual for us, from the earliest of age. But instead, what's habitual is that we claim to be without sin. And when caught in sin, we justify and excuse ourselves. And instead of turning away from sin, even as professing Christians, we live for the desires and cravings of the flesh, the desires and lusts of our eyes, and we're consumed with the pride of life.
In contrast, forgiveness goes to the core of our identity, not just as men, but as believers. It's a posture of humility, gratitude, and worship. If our attitude about sin is right, and we understand our need for forgiveness, and the cost Jesus paid while shedding his blood on that cross, then our lives will follow a much different trajectory.
John Chrysostom said, "By the cross, we know the gravity of sin and the greatness of God's love toward us."
A Christ-Knowing (God-Knowing) Man
1 John 2:13-14 (ESV) John says, "I am writing to you, fathers, because you know him who is from the beginning. I am writing to you, young men, because you have overcome the evil one. I write to you, children, because you know the Father. I write to you, fathers, because you know him who is from the beginning."
Notice that John speaks of knowing him who is from the beginning and also knowing the Father. John is talking about the importance of fathers, young men, and children knowing the God the Father and Jesus the Son. Every young child, young man, and father looks up to some other man. We're prone to imitation. We imitate athletes, musicians, and rock stars.
If you watched the news this week, it was Justin Bieber this, and Justin Bieber that. Here is a young man who at 19 years of age has had every pleasure his eyes have lusted for, has satisfied every craving and desire he's yearned for, and he's known the pride of life-- with millions of young "Beliebers" around the world idolizing him, buying his music, cheering him on, and laughing at his missteps. I was in a store a while back when his song came on the radio and a little girl, maybe 4 or 5, just lit up! I read where some young man spent 100,000 dollars in plastic surgery in order to look just like Justin.
Justin's father left his family when Justin was a small child. Justin's never had a father figure worth imitating. All the older men he's ever known have catered to his pride and ego, and to his hedonistic impulses. His father recently came back into his life, but not to be a father. He came back in order to join the party. It's a disastrous thing when young men, especially children, are left to their own devices. It's infinitely more disastrous when they lack a single redemptive example to imitate. The Bible says in Proverbs 14:12 (ESV), "There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death." Justin is living a fast and furious lifestyle. He's become a law unto himself. Even his handlers have lost control of him, and they fear his life will come to a tragic end.
The apostle John insists that knowing the Father and Son is integral to manhood. If our idea of God, our idea of fatherhood and sonship is pure, it will shape and mold the kind of men we're becoming. We know that the Father is holy, righteous, and above all, good. We know that the Son was subject to the Father, not with a spirit of resentment, but in love. We know that the Son, in submission to Father, radiated the Father's glory, the Father's beauty, and the Father's image. Jesus invites us to not only know the Father, but to follow in his footsteps. What a different life we live when Christ's example is set before us from an early age. It's never too late to begin knowing God.
But if our idea of God is wrong, then our lives will be wrong, our impulses will be misguided, our character will be corrupt, and our path will be reckless. Instead of becoming sons of God, we'll become children of the devil. Instead of walking in the light of God's glory, we'll walk in darkness. What seems right to us now, will ultimately destroy us later.
Colossians 3:10 (ESV) says that we, "...have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator."
A Word-Abiding Man
1 John 2:14 (ESV) continues, "I write to you, young men, because you are strong, and the word of God abides in you, and you have overcome the evil one." 1 John 2:17 (ESV) says, "...whoever does the will of God abides forever."
Just like we all look to certain men to imitate, so we look to certain men as trusted authorities. What stock do you as a man put into the words of God? This idea of abiding in God's words comes from John 15:1-11 (ESV) where Jesus says, "I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. If anyone does not abide in me he is thrown away like a branch and withers; and the branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned. If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples. As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. If you keep my commandments you will abide in my love, just I have kept my Father's commandments and abide in his love. These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full."
To abide in Christ means to be wholly dependent upon the words of Christ to sustain you. Just as a branch is wholly dependent upon the vine to thrive, and to bear fruit, so we are wholly dependent upon Christ's words and his commandments to thrive and bear fruit. And just as a branch withers when cut off from the vine, so we too wither when cut off from the words of Jesus our Lord. The joy, however, is in abiding in Christ's words. Which words and whose words do you most abide in? The world's or the Father's? Our culture's or our creator's? Some American idol's or the Lord's?
The apostle John says an interesting thing, men who are fully forgiven, Christ-loving and God-knowing men, word-abiding men, have overcome the world. Not will overcome, but have overcome the world.
Speaking of your man card, the respectable thing for a man to be held accountable for is whether he's forgiven, whether he knows the Father, and whether he abides in Jesus' words. In Ecclesiastes, by God's grace, Solomon realized that his whole formula for life was failing, not for lack of trying, but for lack of fearing God and keeping his commandments. The whole duty of man, Solomon realized, was to be a man who walks with God. What does it take for you to learn the same?